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You’ll fall in love with her strength, her resilience, her ability to see the good when it seems all she has known is bad, and you’ll fall in love with how guarded she is accepting of the challenge. What i would personally do as the first step, is to talk to a professional who treats people with addiction and seek advice from them on what to do and what not to do.She’ll let you into her world and she’ll take you to her favorite places that she’s only been to alone. Your loved one is most likely going through depression as well (in addition to the addiction) if she/he is pushing you away - which is one of the typical signs of depression.
Before you can ask for what you want, you have to First, begin to ask for what you want from yourself. If you want to be kinder, more open, more outgoing and courageous then slowly begin to ask yourself to take those risks. If you want to be accepted then begin to ask for it. Learn to ask for what you want and start with yourself.
Keep asking yourself for what you want until you give into yourself and finally do it. We believe that things will never change, and that the past predicts our future. We believe, most detrimentally, that if others really knew us they wouldn’t like us. In relationships I used to give political and ambiguous answers when asked tough questions.
I would meander, I would talk in circles, and I would bullshit.
When I learned to simply say yes or no and stop explaining I found that I could get my point across a lot easier.
Walls protect us from having to share the back story. Learning to say yes, no and I don’t want to talk about it can be critical in dating. Sometimes we’re afraid to answer straightforward questions so we avoid getting close to anyone who might ask.